on eharmony there is a portion of your profile that states 'things you can't live without'. this is what i have listed as one thing i can't live without: something to look forward to. the other things are necessities to me but i think i could actually live without them if it really came down to it.
however, i don't think i could live without something to look forward to. between the time of my separation and divorce, it was crucial for me to have something to look forward to. anything to look forward to. the triathlon that april and the trip to italy and turkey were great things i had sporadically planned to do. that same year brought the trip to nyc in the summer and the trip to thailand during christmas of '08.
2009 was a little more low-key travel wise but there were things i looked forward to. the irongirl in may, girls' camp in the summer and the pumpkinman in october were biggies. tennis kept me busy as well.
so far there are things i am looking forward to in 2010. in february i'm going home to help mom and monica pack during president's day weekend. in march, wedding bells ring for my dear friend noelle. april may include a cruise to cabo with 1000 other lds singles. in july, hawaii to see newborn niece numero deux along with some time on kauai with my travel buddy wendi.
if i were ms. moneybags i'd probably have more to do but i think these plans are good. i am thankful that i am able to engage in these activities and i am thankful for the good people with whom i get to spend my time. life is good.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Saturday, January 30, 2010
mix 'n mingle
i just got home from a mid-singles 'mix 'n mingle' activity. the age range of the participants was 26-36 but i dragged my 22 year old visiting teachee brandi with me. we had a fun time. i kept my expectations low and was pleased.
we met in the cultural hall of the robindale chapel. a 3 dollar entry fee got us into a gymnasium decorated with black butcher paper along the walls. toward the top of the paper was a white chalk-drawn skyline lit with white christmas lights. 10 round tables were covered with plastic red and white checkered picnic table cloths. 8 chairs surrounded each simply decorated table. after the name tags and table numbers were given out, we went to the italian soda bar. my first drink was a virgin blood orange spritzer with a slice of lemmon... is it me or does this sound really strange coming from a church setting?
we were the first to sit at our assigned table #5. two other gals sat at our table and made small talk. then a couple of guys came and sat. the tables filled up pretty quickly. i was impressed by the turnout. when the activity finally started, we learned that each course would bring a new set of guys from the previous table number. so, with bread sticks we chatted with a set of guys, salad came next with a new group of guys, pizza followed and then finally, cheesecake. (thank goodness i had lactaid in my purse. dairy products don't do my body good) the speed dating or whatever that was was a clever way for everyone to get a gander at one another and get a feel of who was interested in whom.
i have to say that being single again isn't half bad. don't get me wrong, i miss the perks of marriagedom but i do feel like i'm back at this stage of life because i need to learn or re-learn things that i hadn't quite picked up the first time around. things like how to be comfortable in my own skin, and who gives a rip what others think about me, and we're all in this boat together so let's make it a party cruise ship-if we can.
we met in the cultural hall of the robindale chapel. a 3 dollar entry fee got us into a gymnasium decorated with black butcher paper along the walls. toward the top of the paper was a white chalk-drawn skyline lit with white christmas lights. 10 round tables were covered with plastic red and white checkered picnic table cloths. 8 chairs surrounded each simply decorated table. after the name tags and table numbers were given out, we went to the italian soda bar. my first drink was a virgin blood orange spritzer with a slice of lemmon... is it me or does this sound really strange coming from a church setting?
we were the first to sit at our assigned table #5. two other gals sat at our table and made small talk. then a couple of guys came and sat. the tables filled up pretty quickly. i was impressed by the turnout. when the activity finally started, we learned that each course would bring a new set of guys from the previous table number. so, with bread sticks we chatted with a set of guys, salad came next with a new group of guys, pizza followed and then finally, cheesecake. (thank goodness i had lactaid in my purse. dairy products don't do my body good) the speed dating or whatever that was was a clever way for everyone to get a gander at one another and get a feel of who was interested in whom.
i have to say that being single again isn't half bad. don't get me wrong, i miss the perks of marriagedom but i do feel like i'm back at this stage of life because i need to learn or re-learn things that i hadn't quite picked up the first time around. things like how to be comfortable in my own skin, and who gives a rip what others think about me, and we're all in this boat together so let's make it a party cruise ship-if we can.
Friday, January 29, 2010
chicken bones
it seems i'm always icing something. today's spot: the back part of my right ankle. i tweaked it walking back to my desk this afternoon. i didn't step on anything uneven but by the way i keeled over, you'd think i had rolled on a pine cone but i didn't. i didn't step on anything but a flat plastic chair mat. my ankle just gave out.
mom, i love you. i love that you barely hit 4'10" and are pushing about 97 lbs. i love that you're petite, cute and delicate. but what i wish you had were stronger joints that you would've passed down to me. chicken legs, ankles, wrists and all, my body is a spitting image of you- only enlarged about 150%.
mom, i love you. i love that you barely hit 4'10" and are pushing about 97 lbs. i love that you're petite, cute and delicate. but what i wish you had were stronger joints that you would've passed down to me. chicken legs, ankles, wrists and all, my body is a spitting image of you- only enlarged about 150%.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
cars schmars
cars aren't assets. they never are, they never will be. i guess the rare exception is if they're antiques that you never drive. but in general, cars are just straight up money pits.
the annoying thing is that i need one to get around. and as i do, i rack up miles, and with those miles, gasoline must be purchased, maintenance schedules need to be followed, and eventually repairs must be made. and if one hasn't paid off their car, those pesky payments are a huge chunk out of the pocketbook. oh, and insurance. how could i forget insurance?
i recently had front ball joints replaced. shortly after that, i needed a radiator. quite soon i'll need tires. these are all things that cost well over a crisp hundred dollar bill. more like 4-8 of them. as the mileage on my car increases, more things will have to be replaced. i'm cringing as i type this.
believe me, if we didn't have winters or rain, i'd be taking the trusty vespa to work and everywhere else. but that would mean i'd need a motorcycle license.
the annoying thing is that i need one to get around. and as i do, i rack up miles, and with those miles, gasoline must be purchased, maintenance schedules need to be followed, and eventually repairs must be made. and if one hasn't paid off their car, those pesky payments are a huge chunk out of the pocketbook. oh, and insurance. how could i forget insurance?
i recently had front ball joints replaced. shortly after that, i needed a radiator. quite soon i'll need tires. these are all things that cost well over a crisp hundred dollar bill. more like 4-8 of them. as the mileage on my car increases, more things will have to be replaced. i'm cringing as i type this.
believe me, if we didn't have winters or rain, i'd be taking the trusty vespa to work and everywhere else. but that would mean i'd need a motorcycle license.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
mundane or extraordinary?
writing my last post reminded me of what i wanted to write about last sunday but forgot so here goes. i’m pretty tight with the young women’s presidency with whom i serve. on most sundays i can be found dining with our president’s family.
last sunday wasn’t any different other than the visit we were to make to a couple of our young women- who happen to be sisters. at about 7pm our first counselor sheri arrived to pick amy and i up. we talked a bit at the house before leaving. we were going over to visit these two sisters (who are often absent) to say hello and invite them to our fun upcoming tuesday activity.
when we drove up to the house there were 3 cars taking up their driveway. one car wasn’t theirs but looked like it belonged to one of the girl’s friend. we parked behind the friend’s car and proceeded to the front of the large dimly lit home.
it took a couple minutes before someone came to the door. we heard short voices in the house and then saw someone quickly look through the long window to the right of the door. a high school aged girl answered the door. she wasn’t part of the family we were wanting to visit but she claimed she was house sitting for them. and she mentioned she didn’t know when the family would be back. this girl seemed a little uneasy as she spoke.
when we turned around to leave, a young teen-aged boy was coming toward us. the girl was a bit startled to see him and tried to quickly close the door. we almost ran into him as he stared at his phone (reading or texting). he didn’t make eye contact but mumbled that he was looking for a different house number. he turned around and walked and across the street.
all these events were fluttering red flags that something wasn’t right. so after we got into sheri’s car, we hung around a little debating what we should do. we weren’t sure if the girl was in danger or if she had just been caught trying to sneak a boy into the house. so, we drove down the street to follow him. we saw him walking into the park adjacent to the house.
he was still walking away from the same exact spot when we made a second pass behind the cement path he took. we decided to go back to the house, knock on the door and make sure the girl would be safe after we left. amy went up to the door while we waited in the idling car parked in front of the house. as she walked to the door we saw, in the shadows of the driveway, the silhouettes of 2 girls sneaking around the cars careful to avoid amy. i recognized the second shadow as the girl we had just met. they made their way to the end of the driveway and took off running toward the park.
what was my point in recording this story? i’m not sure. however, i am sure that there was a ‘reason’ we arrived at this family’s house at this specific time and on this specific day; a reason that i can’t define.
there have been other times in my life when intersections like these have happened. connections made in meeting and interacting with people, for short or long periods of time, have turned out to be learning and growing experiences. the giving and taking of knowledge, skills, emotions, words and actions between people can be seen as commonplace but when too many 'coincidences' come together, i am prone to feel that they have not occured by happenstance.
the people i met as a missionary in new york would fall into this category for me. the people i've met in this ward, and the man who took home a shower in the back of his truck and parked it right in front of my front window when i was in desperate need of replacing a bath surround of a rental property i had in washington (once a upon a time) is another.
i choose to believe that these convergences are answers to prayers for ourselves or for others made by ourselves or by others.
last sunday wasn’t any different other than the visit we were to make to a couple of our young women- who happen to be sisters. at about 7pm our first counselor sheri arrived to pick amy and i up. we talked a bit at the house before leaving. we were going over to visit these two sisters (who are often absent) to say hello and invite them to our fun upcoming tuesday activity.
when we drove up to the house there were 3 cars taking up their driveway. one car wasn’t theirs but looked like it belonged to one of the girl’s friend. we parked behind the friend’s car and proceeded to the front of the large dimly lit home.
it took a couple minutes before someone came to the door. we heard short voices in the house and then saw someone quickly look through the long window to the right of the door. a high school aged girl answered the door. she wasn’t part of the family we were wanting to visit but she claimed she was house sitting for them. and she mentioned she didn’t know when the family would be back. this girl seemed a little uneasy as she spoke.
when we turned around to leave, a young teen-aged boy was coming toward us. the girl was a bit startled to see him and tried to quickly close the door. we almost ran into him as he stared at his phone (reading or texting). he didn’t make eye contact but mumbled that he was looking for a different house number. he turned around and walked and across the street.
all these events were fluttering red flags that something wasn’t right. so after we got into sheri’s car, we hung around a little debating what we should do. we weren’t sure if the girl was in danger or if she had just been caught trying to sneak a boy into the house. so, we drove down the street to follow him. we saw him walking into the park adjacent to the house.
he was still walking away from the same exact spot when we made a second pass behind the cement path he took. we decided to go back to the house, knock on the door and make sure the girl would be safe after we left. amy went up to the door while we waited in the idling car parked in front of the house. as she walked to the door we saw, in the shadows of the driveway, the silhouettes of 2 girls sneaking around the cars careful to avoid amy. i recognized the second shadow as the girl we had just met. they made their way to the end of the driveway and took off running toward the park.
what was my point in recording this story? i’m not sure. however, i am sure that there was a ‘reason’ we arrived at this family’s house at this specific time and on this specific day; a reason that i can’t define.
there have been other times in my life when intersections like these have happened. connections made in meeting and interacting with people, for short or long periods of time, have turned out to be learning and growing experiences. the giving and taking of knowledge, skills, emotions, words and actions between people can be seen as commonplace but when too many 'coincidences' come together, i am prone to feel that they have not occured by happenstance.
the people i met as a missionary in new york would fall into this category for me. the people i've met in this ward, and the man who took home a shower in the back of his truck and parked it right in front of my front window when i was in desperate need of replacing a bath surround of a rental property i had in washington (once a upon a time) is another.
i choose to believe that these convergences are answers to prayers for ourselves or for others made by ourselves or by others.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
fix you
is one of my favorite coldplay songs. i have it on thanks to jalae's blog playlist. it's not the most positive song but it helps me... in some weird, hopeful way. maybe i'm secretly wishing my prince charming will find me and woo me by singing it at the most opportune moment. this is why chick flicks are so bad.
i feel like i'm in a bit of a somber mood from yesterday's birthday high. maybe i'm just tired. i should be in bed but then i'd be falling short of my goal to blog at least once a day. work has been busy and the cosco computer nazis have again initiated the high voltage blog fences. so, i can't post or read during the day. i've been plenty busy so that really hasn't been a problem.
i don't like looking at my glass as half empty but upon hearing some news about another in a situation similar to mine (for a year less than i) who 'appears' to have found her potential prince charming, i can't help but wonder 'what's wrong with me? what am i doing wrong?' getting down on myself does no good. so, i try to divert my thoughts elsewhere and know that the events of life-mundane or extraordinary-aren't always orchestrated by human hands but heavenly ones. and this brings me a little peace.
i feel like i'm in a bit of a somber mood from yesterday's birthday high. maybe i'm just tired. i should be in bed but then i'd be falling short of my goal to blog at least once a day. work has been busy and the cosco computer nazis have again initiated the high voltage blog fences. so, i can't post or read during the day. i've been plenty busy so that really hasn't been a problem.
i don't like looking at my glass as half empty but upon hearing some news about another in a situation similar to mine (for a year less than i) who 'appears' to have found her potential prince charming, i can't help but wonder 'what's wrong with me? what am i doing wrong?' getting down on myself does no good. so, i try to divert my thoughts elsewhere and know that the events of life-mundane or extraordinary-aren't always orchestrated by human hands but heavenly ones. and this brings me a little peace.
Monday, January 25, 2010
h.b. to me
i had a great birthday. i took the first half of the day of work off (sick), dressed up in one of my down east dresses (purchased with my birthday gift card) and spent the rest of the day among friends. my visiting teacher flora had me over for dinner. she made me some of my favorite things to eat. we had burgers (turkey and yummy), homemade potato salad, homemade lemon meringue pie and homemade ice cream (made with almond milk cuz i'm lactose intolerant).
i also had promised to stop by the littels to receive some loving harassment that i've missed. when i say that i'm blessed with good friends (and family), i mean it. i really am. i love being with good, fun, happy people. the cards, facebook wishes, phone messages and texts were all tender expressions. so thank you.
below is a picture of the unexpected gifts i received. 3 thoughtful cards, bath salts, energy bars and goo, an rei gift card and an invite to the rei garage sale, a great smelling candle, a down east gift card (with which i purchased two great dresses), a personal ice cream maker, and a whole lot of water just in case. thank you mom, monica, flora, nancy, megan, teryl, john, jaden, leslie, amy, kathleen, sheri, chris, kris, niki, susan, steve, noelle and all the rest of yous!!! love you mucho!
p.s. my two year old niece niki left a message singing me happy birthday. i also got a bonus gift-the one two buckle my shoe nursery rhyme. i wish could post that. she makes me melt.
i also had promised to stop by the littels to receive some loving harassment that i've missed. when i say that i'm blessed with good friends (and family), i mean it. i really am. i love being with good, fun, happy people. the cards, facebook wishes, phone messages and texts were all tender expressions. so thank you.
below is a picture of the unexpected gifts i received. 3 thoughtful cards, bath salts, energy bars and goo, an rei gift card and an invite to the rei garage sale, a great smelling candle, a down east gift card (with which i purchased two great dresses), a personal ice cream maker, and a whole lot of water just in case. thank you mom, monica, flora, nancy, megan, teryl, john, jaden, leslie, amy, kathleen, sheri, chris, kris, niki, susan, steve, noelle and all the rest of yous!!! love you mucho!
p.s. my two year old niece niki left a message singing me happy birthday. i also got a bonus gift-the one two buckle my shoe nursery rhyme. i wish could post that. she makes me melt.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
beautiful day for a run
these past couple of days have been dark, grey and chilly. we've also had some much needed rain... more like drizzle. this morning was different. although, it's still a bit chilly, the sky was a bright blue dotted with harmless passing clouds. i figured the afternoon sun would warm things up a bit. so, i went for a run.
while i started my trot up the hill i thought, the sun feels great. the air is brisk and cool, but not unbearable. if i keep out of the shade, i'll be ok. i kept a very slow comfortable pace and continued moving. i couldn't stop thinking that these conditions had to be the best i have ever had. the views of the snow speckled mountain tops were spectacular and the scene of the city valley was clear.
i took a longer route than i usually do. i ran down then up a hill i've never run. i learned that i like downhills more than uphills. i also learned that hot baths do wonders.
while i started my trot up the hill i thought, the sun feels great. the air is brisk and cool, but not unbearable. if i keep out of the shade, i'll be ok. i kept a very slow comfortable pace and continued moving. i couldn't stop thinking that these conditions had to be the best i have ever had. the views of the snow speckled mountain tops were spectacular and the scene of the city valley was clear.
i took a longer route than i usually do. i ran down then up a hill i've never run. i learned that i like downhills more than uphills. i also learned that hot baths do wonders.
food questions
what does saffron taste like?
why is it so expensive?
what do truffles taste like?
and why are they so expensive?
what's the big deal about caviar?
why do i love food so much?
why is it so expensive?
what do truffles taste like?
and why are they so expensive?
what's the big deal about caviar?
why do i love food so much?
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
discernment
two weekends ago we had a lesson in young women's about gifts of the spirit found in the doctrine & covenants (also found in 1 cor. 12:4-10). some of these gifts were listed on the board. one of the girls asked what the gift of discerning of spirits meant.
since that lesson, i have often thought about that gift. doing incredibly limited research, i have found an article in the february 2002 ensign article by Elder Robert D. Hales entitled 'gifts of the spirit'. within the article are some precious gems that i want to note.
-we can have the gift of discerning of spirits. george q. cannon has called the gift of discerning of spirits 'a gift that is of exceeding value and one that should be enjoyed by every latter-day saint. ...no latter-day saint should be without this gift, because there is such a variety of spirits in the world which seek to deceive and lead astray'.
-some may mean well but are listening to the wrong influence. some people operate in a spirit of contention-clever with words from much practice, but not focused on correcting their own imperfections. they focus on the imperfections of others.
-sometimes we are drawn into seeking and giving answers that bring recognition or notoriety to 'our' thinking and 'our' opinion. don't look for signs or answers that build you up. humility and submissiveness to God will always be fundamental in receiving direction from Him.
-others operate in a spirit of gratitude to the Lord for the gospel and concentrate on correcting their own imperfections.
-we can develop the ability to discern what spirit is influencing others and ourselves. we should seek and pray for this gift lest we be deceived.
other that the fact that i feel like time is racing by, and with that my clock continues ticking, the gift of discerning of spirits is something i pray for and hope to strengthen. i'm hoping that my will in doing so aligns with His.
since that lesson, i have often thought about that gift. doing incredibly limited research, i have found an article in the february 2002 ensign article by Elder Robert D. Hales entitled 'gifts of the spirit'. within the article are some precious gems that i want to note.
-we can have the gift of discerning of spirits. george q. cannon has called the gift of discerning of spirits 'a gift that is of exceeding value and one that should be enjoyed by every latter-day saint. ...no latter-day saint should be without this gift, because there is such a variety of spirits in the world which seek to deceive and lead astray'.
-some may mean well but are listening to the wrong influence. some people operate in a spirit of contention-clever with words from much practice, but not focused on correcting their own imperfections. they focus on the imperfections of others.
-sometimes we are drawn into seeking and giving answers that bring recognition or notoriety to 'our' thinking and 'our' opinion. don't look for signs or answers that build you up. humility and submissiveness to God will always be fundamental in receiving direction from Him.
-others operate in a spirit of gratitude to the Lord for the gospel and concentrate on correcting their own imperfections.
-we can develop the ability to discern what spirit is influencing others and ourselves. we should seek and pray for this gift lest we be deceived.
other that the fact that i feel like time is racing by, and with that my clock continues ticking, the gift of discerning of spirits is something i pray for and hope to strengthen. i'm hoping that my will in doing so aligns with His.
coke zero
why caffeine can be bad for me...
since about 8 this morning i've had the following thoughts after a tall styrofoam cup of coke zero.
-i have a secret crush on clay aiken's voice. i can't stop playing that solitaire song over and over. man, he's got a set of pipes. (he plays for the other team so that's about as far as that crush goes)
-is it friday yet?
-i heart food. what kind of breakfast was that? spring mix salad with 2 hard-boiled eggs topped with creamy cilantro dressing. wah? that was sure yummy.
-why is my neck still buggin'? can't wait till tomorrow's massage.
-gifts of the spirit... why does one in particular keep popping into my head? should i write about it? how do i do it delicately?
since about 8 this morning i've had the following thoughts after a tall styrofoam cup of coke zero.
-i have a secret crush on clay aiken's voice. i can't stop playing that solitaire song over and over. man, he's got a set of pipes. (he plays for the other team so that's about as far as that crush goes)
-is it friday yet?
-i heart food. what kind of breakfast was that? spring mix salad with 2 hard-boiled eggs topped with creamy cilantro dressing. wah? that was sure yummy.
-why is my neck still buggin'? can't wait till tomorrow's massage.
-gifts of the spirit... why does one in particular keep popping into my head? should i write about it? how do i do it delicately?
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
hello, my name is rika and i am a self-diagonsed hypochondriac
current symptoms : neck and shoulder pain. turning head from side to side causes a feeling of soreness and ache right below my skull and down my neck
most likely cause of neck pain (thanks to the internet): my talalay latex pillow, poor sleeping posture, swimming, sitting posture/position.
unlikely but possible causes (also thanks to the internet): stress (i don't feel stressed though), illness approaching, fibromyalgia, neck arthritis, meningitis.
course of action: night 2-ibuprofen and heating pad, night 3-ibuprofen and massage, this, day 4- stretching and 800mg of ibuprofen
so far, i'm feeling loopy, sleepy and the pain being masked by the 800 mg ibuprofen horse pill.
most likely cause of neck pain (thanks to the internet): my talalay latex pillow, poor sleeping posture, swimming, sitting posture/position.
unlikely but possible causes (also thanks to the internet): stress (i don't feel stressed though), illness approaching, fibromyalgia, neck arthritis, meningitis.
course of action: night 2-ibuprofen and heating pad, night 3-ibuprofen and massage, this, day 4- stretching and 800mg of ibuprofen
so far, i'm feeling loopy, sleepy and the pain being masked by the 800 mg ibuprofen horse pill.
Monday, January 18, 2010
goodie before grody
i think i have quite possibly smelled the worst case of body odor at the gym today. i wanted to hurl it was so heinous. even worse, after i jumped off my first treadmill, i mistakenly went downwind of this person. just thought i'd share.
before experiencing that, i did have a great massage at a reflexology joint down the street. for the last 3 days my neck has been stiff. i don't know what i did to it but the pain has almost been unbearable. i haven't been able to turn my head to the left and to the right without experiencing pain. a chair massage was just what i needed. it was wonderful. i think i'll be back.
before experiencing that, i did have a great massage at a reflexology joint down the street. for the last 3 days my neck has been stiff. i don't know what i did to it but the pain has almost been unbearable. i haven't been able to turn my head to the left and to the right without experiencing pain. a chair massage was just what i needed. it was wonderful. i think i'll be back.
zebras don't have ulcers?
how scientists know this is beyond me. i'm sure there has to be at least one zebra with an ulcer. anyway, that isn't the point.
i've stated before that pbs is a favorite station of mine. i happen to be watching a little of it last night before dinner. facing our fears was the name of the program. one of the people being studied was a young girl in college who had a fear of flying. she had anxieties and feelings of panic (panic attacks) a few days prior to a flight she had to take with her therapist. this girl had expressed that her fears were irrational as they didn't necessarily have to do with the plane crashing or malfunctioning. through her tears i could tell she was pretty upset about having to ride on a plane. i didn't get to watch the end of the program so i don't know what became of this girl. but i did catch a part that made me think about how i deal with worries and fears.
we all have worries, fears and maybe even phobias. they may have been passed down through ancestors who had learned somewhere along the line that spiders, snakes bears, lions and other things could harm and even kill them. but, it was mentioned that we may be too advanced for our own good. take, for instance, the things that we know are potential threats to our happiness- the worries of things that could happen but haven't. constantly entertaining fears and worries isn't good for anyone. recognizing when i happen to be doing this has been a key to my happiness.
this is where the lesson of the zebra comes to play. zebras are happy eating, grazing, and doing whatever else zebras do. when a lion starts charging after them, their instincts kick in, and they run. surely, they feel the panic, fear and adrenaline while a threat on their lives is actually upon them. but what happens after the lion isn't after them? they're back to grazing, hanging out...chillaxing.
i think i can learn something from this way of life. yes, i still need to prepare for the future by way of saving, food and water storage, having various plans and whatnot. but once preparations have been made, the energy and health wasted by worrying of what may or may not come is unproductive. for me, there is wisdom in 'i'll cross that bridge when i get there'.
doc.&cov. 38:30
ps. 34:4
prov.1:33
luke12:7&32
deut31:6&8
isa41:10, 13 and the list goes on...
i've stated before that pbs is a favorite station of mine. i happen to be watching a little of it last night before dinner. facing our fears was the name of the program. one of the people being studied was a young girl in college who had a fear of flying. she had anxieties and feelings of panic (panic attacks) a few days prior to a flight she had to take with her therapist. this girl had expressed that her fears were irrational as they didn't necessarily have to do with the plane crashing or malfunctioning. through her tears i could tell she was pretty upset about having to ride on a plane. i didn't get to watch the end of the program so i don't know what became of this girl. but i did catch a part that made me think about how i deal with worries and fears.
we all have worries, fears and maybe even phobias. they may have been passed down through ancestors who had learned somewhere along the line that spiders, snakes bears, lions and other things could harm and even kill them. but, it was mentioned that we may be too advanced for our own good. take, for instance, the things that we know are potential threats to our happiness- the worries of things that could happen but haven't. constantly entertaining fears and worries isn't good for anyone. recognizing when i happen to be doing this has been a key to my happiness.
this is where the lesson of the zebra comes to play. zebras are happy eating, grazing, and doing whatever else zebras do. when a lion starts charging after them, their instincts kick in, and they run. surely, they feel the panic, fear and adrenaline while a threat on their lives is actually upon them. but what happens after the lion isn't after them? they're back to grazing, hanging out...chillaxing.
i think i can learn something from this way of life. yes, i still need to prepare for the future by way of saving, food and water storage, having various plans and whatnot. but once preparations have been made, the energy and health wasted by worrying of what may or may not come is unproductive. for me, there is wisdom in 'i'll cross that bridge when i get there'.
doc.&cov. 38:30
ps. 34:4
prov.1:33
luke12:7&32
deut31:6&8
isa41:10, 13 and the list goes on...
Friday, January 15, 2010
nerves of steel
are something i don't have right now but wish i did. i can't figure out if my innards are twisted up in a ball because of : 1) something i ate 2) concern for the people recovering from the quake in haiti 3) meeting chris for the first time after talking on the phone for over a year or 4) a combination of all of the above.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
red cross
email i received from my Relief Society President
Red Cross officials are asking people to carefully consider the best way they can help — which is most often a monetary donation or partnering with the Red Cross to raise money.Susan Thomas, communications director for the Utah region, said a quick way for people on the move to donate is to send the text message "Haiti" to 90999 — which will automatically send a donation of $10 to the Red Cross. Texters will then be billed for the donation on their next cell phone bill.Donations to the Red Cross International Response Fund — used for international relief work — can be made by calling 1-800-RED-CROSS or online at http://www.utahredcross.org/ and clicking on the "donate" tab.
Red Cross officials are asking people to carefully consider the best way they can help — which is most often a monetary donation or partnering with the Red Cross to raise money.Susan Thomas, communications director for the Utah region, said a quick way for people on the move to donate is to send the text message "Haiti" to 90999 — which will automatically send a donation of $10 to the Red Cross. Texters will then be billed for the donation on their next cell phone bill.Donations to the Red Cross International Response Fund — used for international relief work — can be made by calling 1-800-RED-CROSS or online at http://www.utahredcross.org/ and clicking on the "donate" tab.
self sufficiency
it is difficult to listen to the radio (npr) or read the news (cnn.com). the effects of tuesday's 7.0 earthquake in haiti are devastating. seeing news footage of a haitian woman in mourning and shock rocking herself back and forth and wailing is heart-wrenching to say the least.
i am in awe of and have feelings of gratitude and reverence for those who spring quickly to aid and try to alleviate suffering. other than prayers, the only way i see myself helping is by increasing the amount of 'humanitarian aid' i normally contribute. if you know of more i can do, i am open to suggestions.
i cannot help but timidly attempt to put myself in the shoes of haitians struggling in the aftermath. i think about what reports reveal about water being the item most needed for survival followed by food and sanitation to prevent the spread of disease. this morning's commentary revolved around how unstable an environment it will be if people start to fight for survival. i wonder what i would do. if a similar disaster were to occur nearby, would i be OK?
while listening to the news during yesterday's lunch hour, i found it interesting that a haitian radio host (in brooklyn, ny) speaking to another on npr brought up how some of the people in haiti were seeing the event as some sort of spiritual awakening. i have no doubt that if something of this magnitude were to happen to me, i'd be pleading with my Maker.
my visiting teachers came over last night to chat and share this month's message entitled 'becoming self-reliant'. not until typing today's blog entry did this all really hit me. i mean, i have prepared myself in some ways. just not all...yet. i need to get my butt moving. how many more times do i have to be told? i do not have the luxury nor the stupidity to say that i never knew. for years and years i have been taught to prepare. prepare for emergencies, disasters, job loss, for anything and everything. both lovingly and sternly, i have been told to prepare.
so, i need more water. i don't think i could have too much water. i could probably be fine for month if i was really careful. but that's still not enough. also, i need a butane stove. i gave the crappy camp stove up in the divorce thinking i'd get myself a better one. i have yet to do so. my next purchase will be this from costco. in the meantime, i need to figure out a toilet system if the plumbing were to go out. hey, i have to think about this stuff.
i wish there was something i could do to move rubble in port au prince... something to somehow relieve suffering. i hope the suffering and death that comes as a result won't be in vain.
i am in awe of and have feelings of gratitude and reverence for those who spring quickly to aid and try to alleviate suffering. other than prayers, the only way i see myself helping is by increasing the amount of 'humanitarian aid' i normally contribute. if you know of more i can do, i am open to suggestions.
i cannot help but timidly attempt to put myself in the shoes of haitians struggling in the aftermath. i think about what reports reveal about water being the item most needed for survival followed by food and sanitation to prevent the spread of disease. this morning's commentary revolved around how unstable an environment it will be if people start to fight for survival. i wonder what i would do. if a similar disaster were to occur nearby, would i be OK?
while listening to the news during yesterday's lunch hour, i found it interesting that a haitian radio host (in brooklyn, ny) speaking to another on npr brought up how some of the people in haiti were seeing the event as some sort of spiritual awakening. i have no doubt that if something of this magnitude were to happen to me, i'd be pleading with my Maker.
my visiting teachers came over last night to chat and share this month's message entitled 'becoming self-reliant'. not until typing today's blog entry did this all really hit me. i mean, i have prepared myself in some ways. just not all...yet. i need to get my butt moving. how many more times do i have to be told? i do not have the luxury nor the stupidity to say that i never knew. for years and years i have been taught to prepare. prepare for emergencies, disasters, job loss, for anything and everything. both lovingly and sternly, i have been told to prepare.
so, i need more water. i don't think i could have too much water. i could probably be fine for month if i was really careful. but that's still not enough. also, i need a butane stove. i gave the crappy camp stove up in the divorce thinking i'd get myself a better one. i have yet to do so. my next purchase will be this from costco. in the meantime, i need to figure out a toilet system if the plumbing were to go out. hey, i have to think about this stuff.
i wish there was something i could do to move rubble in port au prince... something to somehow relieve suffering. i hope the suffering and death that comes as a result won't be in vain.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
do you ever...
do you ever get one of those headaches that when you lean or turn your head a certain way you can't even bear it? it feels like your eye is bulging and about to pop out with one false move? i've got one of those. i think it has to do with sinuses especially after a rigorous swim. a neti pot cleanse and sleep didn't cure it. i'm hoping that fried bananas from trader joes, hot chocolate and motrin will.
do you ever have a love-hate relationship with exercise? i should call it a hate-love relationship because the hate usually comes before the love of it. i love how i feel after exercising and sometimes while i'm in the middle of it. i just hate having to make myself get to that point.
do you ever think about what life would be like if you couldn't exercise? i do. and i am sure to thank Heavenly Father every night and morning that my body can do what it does. a healthy functioning body is something i know i take for granted but never want Father to think i have ever forgotten that i'm blessed to have it.
do you ever feel happy when you listen to good music? especially in places like work? i do. thanks to http://mrthompsonandme.blogspot.com/, i can listen and work productively.
speaking of work...
do you ever wonder why you are working where you are? i often do. but when the paychecks come, and i have food, shelter and a warm place to rest my head, i am thankful i have a job. i am glad i can afford the comfortable lifestyle i enjoy.
do you ever forget to tell your family that you love them? me! (raising my hand). i try not to. mom, pops, monica, kris, betsy, niki and baby yet to be born, i love you. we don't talk nearly enough for me to tell you over and over. but when we do, i hope i always tell you.
pops is really a big dork.
niki's cheese.
mom and mini mom.
do you ever have a love-hate relationship with exercise? i should call it a hate-love relationship because the hate usually comes before the love of it. i love how i feel after exercising and sometimes while i'm in the middle of it. i just hate having to make myself get to that point.
do you ever think about what life would be like if you couldn't exercise? i do. and i am sure to thank Heavenly Father every night and morning that my body can do what it does. a healthy functioning body is something i know i take for granted but never want Father to think i have ever forgotten that i'm blessed to have it.
do you ever feel happy when you listen to good music? especially in places like work? i do. thanks to http://mrthompsonandme.blogspot.com/, i can listen and work productively.
speaking of work...
do you ever wonder why you are working where you are? i often do. but when the paychecks come, and i have food, shelter and a warm place to rest my head, i am thankful i have a job. i am glad i can afford the comfortable lifestyle i enjoy.
do you ever forget to tell your family that you love them? me! (raising my hand). i try not to. mom, pops, monica, kris, betsy, niki and baby yet to be born, i love you. we don't talk nearly enough for me to tell you over and over. but when we do, i hope i always tell you.
pops is really a big dork.
niki's cheese.
mom and mini mom.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
thoughts
it's difficult to post something when your thoughts are all over the place (what's new?). this being a public blog makes me even more cautious about revealing what's swirling around in my noggin. because i know that i have at least one silent follower (hi leslie), i can't ignore the possibility that there may be more. so, hello out there. welcome.
it has been years since i've written in a journal/diary. i'm glad that i've started again. writing has brought me a little more peace. who doesn't need some of that? plus, i hope to bind these ramblings up at the end of the year for my posterity or whomever ends up reading it. a couple of blogs i follow have shown me how important it is to record your life's happenings.
anywhoo, suffice it to say that jalae's cheesy songs coupled with hormones are helping these emotions along. peter cetera's "next time i fall" pretty much encompasses the thoughts i've had... only the person he's singing about, for me, exists in my imagination, is a fantasy, or is a true story in embryo. i honestly don't know myself.
next time i fall
love like a road that never ends how it leads me back again to heartache i'll never understand.
darling i put my heart upon the shelf 'till the moment was right, and i tell myself next time i fall in love i'll know better what to do. the next time i fall in love it will be with you .
now as i look into your eyes, well i wonder if it's wise to hold you like i've wanted to before.
tonight, i was thinking that you might be the one who breathes life in this heart of mine.
next time i fall in love i'll know better what to do. next time i fall in love, the next time i fall in love, it will be with you.
next time i'm gonna follow through. and if it drives me crazy i will know better why the next time i try.
next time i fall in love i'll know better what to do. next time i fall in love, the next time I fall in love it will be with you.
is it me or is it cheesy in here?
it has been years since i've written in a journal/diary. i'm glad that i've started again. writing has brought me a little more peace. who doesn't need some of that? plus, i hope to bind these ramblings up at the end of the year for my posterity or whomever ends up reading it. a couple of blogs i follow have shown me how important it is to record your life's happenings.
anywhoo, suffice it to say that jalae's cheesy songs coupled with hormones are helping these emotions along. peter cetera's "next time i fall" pretty much encompasses the thoughts i've had... only the person he's singing about, for me, exists in my imagination, is a fantasy, or is a true story in embryo. i honestly don't know myself.
next time i fall
love like a road that never ends how it leads me back again to heartache i'll never understand.
darling i put my heart upon the shelf 'till the moment was right, and i tell myself next time i fall in love i'll know better what to do. the next time i fall in love it will be with you .
now as i look into your eyes, well i wonder if it's wise to hold you like i've wanted to before.
tonight, i was thinking that you might be the one who breathes life in this heart of mine.
next time i fall in love i'll know better what to do. next time i fall in love, the next time i fall in love, it will be with you.
next time i'm gonna follow through. and if it drives me crazy i will know better why the next time i try.
next time i fall in love i'll know better what to do. next time i fall in love, the next time I fall in love it will be with you.
is it me or is it cheesy in here?
Monday, January 11, 2010
housework A.D.D.
i have it. i don't know if there is a cure for it. doing laundry, not a problem. putting it away, problem. it takes me forever to fold and put away clothes. dishes, not too big of a problem. putting away clean dishes can be a problem. mail? forget about it. i have a small pile accumulating. bills and such have been opened and paid but not filed or stored. (i have issues with what i should do with owner's manuals. everything we buy comes with one. i'm afraid that the moment i toss those things out, i'll need them. but where in the frell do you put them?) i'm noticing a pattern. i can't seem to follow through and complete boring tasks.
bathrooms are easy, i feel like i have a system down so those are a cinch. dusting sucks. i don't like doing it because it seems like i'm just moving the dust from one place to another. and then it comes back again way too soon. (not too impressed with those swiffer dusters.) one thing i don't mind is using the vacuum. vacuuming makes me happy. i see results immediately and i have this feeling that the dust i've just pushed around is being sucked up and held in by the hepa filter. plus, a full vacuum bag lets me know some thing's getting done.
martha stewart, i need help. a storage queen is something i am not. i hope to get the garage full of my toys (bike, bike rack, camping/hiking gear, etc.) and household crap put nicely away till need it.
i love a clean house, don't get me wrong, but getting to that state and then keeping it that way is difficult. i don't remember it being this tiresome when i was married. i still hated the chores but they got done. i'd like to think that when i eventually have a family, i'll be on top of this stuff, but right now, i have no motivation... except for the fact that i have a guest coming this weekend. wish me luck.
bathrooms are easy, i feel like i have a system down so those are a cinch. dusting sucks. i don't like doing it because it seems like i'm just moving the dust from one place to another. and then it comes back again way too soon. (not too impressed with those swiffer dusters.) one thing i don't mind is using the vacuum. vacuuming makes me happy. i see results immediately and i have this feeling that the dust i've just pushed around is being sucked up and held in by the hepa filter. plus, a full vacuum bag lets me know some thing's getting done.
martha stewart, i need help. a storage queen is something i am not. i hope to get the garage full of my toys (bike, bike rack, camping/hiking gear, etc.) and household crap put nicely away till need it.
i love a clean house, don't get me wrong, but getting to that state and then keeping it that way is difficult. i don't remember it being this tiresome when i was married. i still hated the chores but they got done. i'd like to think that when i eventually have a family, i'll be on top of this stuff, but right now, i have no motivation... except for the fact that i have a guest coming this weekend. wish me luck.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
"friends are the family we choose for ourselves."
how would we ever survive without friends? these past couple days have been spent among friends. i am so thankful for them. i am thankful i can open up and talk to them, let my walls down with them, watch fun movies like avatar with them, play tennis with them, laugh with them, cry with them, celebrate birthdays and eat yummy rib eye steaks, twice-baked potatoes and cake with them. though i sometimes consider myself a loner, i need friends. near or far, i consider myself blessed to have good friends. i love my friends.
Friday, January 8, 2010
the color code
happy friday!
to take a color personality test prior to reading this click here.
[i would venture to say that many bloggers have a significant amount of blue and perhaps some yellow (as i do) in them... or they wouldn't be blogging. i may be wrong but that's my feeling.]
recently, i've become interested in learning about different temperaments/personality traits/dispositions. why, you ask? well, i'm not gonna lie or beat around the bush. other than to learn more about myself, i want to find a good match/mate/eternal companion. i'm taking a somewhat tested approach this time. i hope i have learned a thing or two from my first failed marriage. the pain of that experience makes me not want to repeat my own mistakes. pain sure is a great teacher isn't it?
it's no coincidence that popular dating sites have some sort of personality test incorporated in their match making. although i am not solely relying on their scientific outcomes, i have opened my mind (and eventually my heart) to possibilities i'd never entertained before. here's to hoping. chris, if you're reading this, i'm glad you are a blue/red. can't wait to hang with you!
for you married folk out there, knowing each other's color makeup may help you better understand what makes your spouse tick. improved communication and deeper connections may result and that is my hope for you. i'm no scientist nor am i a doctor of psychology but my opinion is that happy marriages make the world a better place... for everyone.
to take a color personality test prior to reading this click here.
[i would venture to say that many bloggers have a significant amount of blue and perhaps some yellow (as i do) in them... or they wouldn't be blogging. i may be wrong but that's my feeling.]
recently, i've become interested in learning about different temperaments/personality traits/dispositions. why, you ask? well, i'm not gonna lie or beat around the bush. other than to learn more about myself, i want to find a good match/mate/eternal companion. i'm taking a somewhat tested approach this time. i hope i have learned a thing or two from my first failed marriage. the pain of that experience makes me not want to repeat my own mistakes. pain sure is a great teacher isn't it?
it's no coincidence that popular dating sites have some sort of personality test incorporated in their match making. although i am not solely relying on their scientific outcomes, i have opened my mind (and eventually my heart) to possibilities i'd never entertained before. here's to hoping. chris, if you're reading this, i'm glad you are a blue/red. can't wait to hang with you!
for you married folk out there, knowing each other's color makeup may help you better understand what makes your spouse tick. improved communication and deeper connections may result and that is my hope for you. i'm no scientist nor am i a doctor of psychology but my opinion is that happy marriages make the world a better place... for everyone.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
my car friggin' smells like onions.
since lunch yesterday, every time i get into my car, i smell onions. the smell is strong, piercing, and annoying. it's almost as foul as a bad bout of body odor. i have searched and vacuumed every possible crack and crevice that a sliver of onion would've fallen in. i hope i have found it with the vacuum.
you would've thought that the last time i had onions i'd learned my lesson. picture it- me on the couch on a saturday afternoon. tuna six-inch sub in hand, i had napkins and a plate on my lap. i was careful to lean forward as i took each bite. when i finished, i made sure to wash my sandwich smelling hands. when i sat back on the couch, i could still smell my sandwich. my hands were clean, as was my face. why in the world was i still smelling onions? upon leaning over to reach for something, a tiny diced onion piece dropped from my chest. such a small chunk was giving off a grave smell.
friggin' onions.
you would've thought that the last time i had onions i'd learned my lesson. picture it- me on the couch on a saturday afternoon. tuna six-inch sub in hand, i had napkins and a plate on my lap. i was careful to lean forward as i took each bite. when i finished, i made sure to wash my sandwich smelling hands. when i sat back on the couch, i could still smell my sandwich. my hands were clean, as was my face. why in the world was i still smelling onions? upon leaning over to reach for something, a tiny diced onion piece dropped from my chest. such a small chunk was giving off a grave smell.
friggin' onions.
dream about lola
i had a dream early this morning about lola carmen. lola is the tagalog word for grandmother. she passed away 5 years ago. none of my grandparents are living but she is the only one i can ever recall dreaming about. i have had dreams about lola carmen before but have never written about them. i remember the details of my last dream about her more than i remember my dream this morning. and that bothers me.
i woke up 10 minutes before my alarm was to go off. when i awoke i remember thinking, 'i just had a dream about lola, remember it.' i fell back asleep and can't remember a thing about the dream except for the brief moment of me looking at her feet. the only thing i see is a picture of her feet as if i were standing right in front of her taking a photo of her socks and slippers also capturing the hem of her dress. now that mental picture is fading. strange. i do recall being on some sort of walk or hike with her and having the thought, 'lola's not equipped for this. she's in loose calf-length socks, their elastic worn, and slippers.'
when lola lived with us she used to wear house dresses and slippers. she'd wear baggy socks (that should have been thrown out) with her slippers during the colder months. she made do even when she didn't have to. i think that bothered my mom. lola was a macgyver of sorts. she would fashion tools for the garden out of junk laying around the house or yard. lola would save everything from tin foil to plastic packaging. i know that bothered my mom.
every time i dream about grandma i wonder if she's trying to tell me something. last time i dreamt of her, she was happily twirling around a bright sun-lit living room in a yellow dress as if to show me she was doing well. she was happy. but this time, my dream wasn't as cheery. though the sun was shining, she was ill equipped for the walk. my belief is that she may need a little help to progress or continue walking where she currently is...
i woke up 10 minutes before my alarm was to go off. when i awoke i remember thinking, 'i just had a dream about lola, remember it.' i fell back asleep and can't remember a thing about the dream except for the brief moment of me looking at her feet. the only thing i see is a picture of her feet as if i were standing right in front of her taking a photo of her socks and slippers also capturing the hem of her dress. now that mental picture is fading. strange. i do recall being on some sort of walk or hike with her and having the thought, 'lola's not equipped for this. she's in loose calf-length socks, their elastic worn, and slippers.'
when lola lived with us she used to wear house dresses and slippers. she'd wear baggy socks (that should have been thrown out) with her slippers during the colder months. she made do even when she didn't have to. i think that bothered my mom. lola was a macgyver of sorts. she would fashion tools for the garden out of junk laying around the house or yard. lola would save everything from tin foil to plastic packaging. i know that bothered my mom.
every time i dream about grandma i wonder if she's trying to tell me something. last time i dreamt of her, she was happily twirling around a bright sun-lit living room in a yellow dress as if to show me she was doing well. she was happy. but this time, my dream wasn't as cheery. though the sun was shining, she was ill equipped for the walk. my belief is that she may need a little help to progress or continue walking where she currently is...
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
a visit to the dermatologist
doesn't quite equal the anxiety level of a visit to the dentist but it creeps in that direction. i went to see a dermatologist for the very first time yesterday because of acne. over the past few months i have felt like puberty has come haunting to teach me a lesson on vanity. i've never been to a dermatologist before but when your own mother exclaims 'what happened to your face?' you know it's bad.
as i sat in the waiting room i glanced at a handful of people and wondered, 'what are they doing here?' i saw no acne, no blemishes, no skin conditions. i was a little embarrassed to look at anyone in their good state but also kinda relieved that their complexions were hopefully the result of a good doctor.
after a brief consultation with the dr.'s assistant, the doctor came in and sat on a round wheeled stool about 6 ft away from the examining table where i sat. a different assistant followed shortly with a pad and pen in hand. i voiced my questions and concerns. he answered, still on his stool, glancing at me and my chart. he began to prescribe medication. the assistant wrote on a prescription pad as he spoke. she handed the papers to the dr. who signed them and we were done. bada bing bada bang. i go back in 3 months for a follow up.
as i sat in the waiting room i glanced at a handful of people and wondered, 'what are they doing here?' i saw no acne, no blemishes, no skin conditions. i was a little embarrassed to look at anyone in their good state but also kinda relieved that their complexions were hopefully the result of a good doctor.
after a brief consultation with the dr.'s assistant, the doctor came in and sat on a round wheeled stool about 6 ft away from the examining table where i sat. a different assistant followed shortly with a pad and pen in hand. i voiced my questions and concerns. he answered, still on his stool, glancing at me and my chart. he began to prescribe medication. the assistant wrote on a prescription pad as he spoke. she handed the papers to the dr. who signed them and we were done. bada bing bada bang. i go back in 3 months for a follow up.
Monday, January 4, 2010
AVATAR = AMAZING!!!
i just got back from watching AVATAR in 3D for the first time. i don't like to capitalize letters but for this movie, you will notice that i have. the movie has been out for about 3 weeks and has grossed over a billion doll hairs worldwide. now i know what buzz and hype was all about.
at the risk of sounding blasphemous, there really are no words to describe what i have just beheld. i felt goose bumps, chills, and my palms sweat on more than one occasion. the few within the theater clapped and cheered throughout the movie and of course at the end. i even cried out 'yay!' at its conclusion.
i want to see avatar again and again and again. the concepts, the ideas, the grandeur of this movie were so foreign yet familiar and breathtaking. see it in 3D!
at the risk of sounding blasphemous, there really are no words to describe what i have just beheld. i felt goose bumps, chills, and my palms sweat on more than one occasion. the few within the theater clapped and cheered throughout the movie and of course at the end. i even cried out 'yay!' at its conclusion.
i want to see avatar again and again and again. the concepts, the ideas, the grandeur of this movie were so foreign yet familiar and breathtaking. see it in 3D!
a man's shoes
say a lot about him. now don’t go sliding down the gutter on this one because that is not what i’m getting at. just as it is for women, they are a way to accessorize. he may not recognize shoes as an accessory but by golly, they are. shoes are a way of expressing oneself, knowingly or unknowingly. they are also a necessary piece of apparel for most activities. i always seem to glance at men's shoes whether at church, work, or the gym. call it a hobby, a game, a diversion to occupy my thoughts- or even a fetish.
as an average single woman on a budget who carefully selects her shoes, and often, spends more on them than she should, i wonder if looking at a man's shoe collection would help me to find my match. 'show me your shoes', i'd say after the typical greetings and pleasantries. they would tell me a lot. is he an outdoorsman? a hiker? a climber? a trail runner? a man of the river? is he an athlete? a cyclist? a runner? does he play soccer, basketball or tennis? any biker boots? ;) what type of casual shoes does he wear? would i see jack purcells, new havens, or stan smiths cause it's a plus if i do. are his dress shoes fashionable yet practical because that would draw me in even closer. i'm totally sounding like a superficial freak but these are the thoughts i have entertained.
as an average single woman on a budget who carefully selects her shoes, and often, spends more on them than she should, i wonder if looking at a man's shoe collection would help me to find my match. 'show me your shoes', i'd say after the typical greetings and pleasantries. they would tell me a lot. is he an outdoorsman? a hiker? a climber? a trail runner? a man of the river? is he an athlete? a cyclist? a runner? does he play soccer, basketball or tennis? any biker boots? ;) what type of casual shoes does he wear? would i see jack purcells, new havens, or stan smiths cause it's a plus if i do. are his dress shoes fashionable yet practical because that would draw me in even closer. i'm totally sounding like a superficial freak but these are the thoughts i have entertained.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
give me a story about elephants
and i will give you my complete attention. i can't remember when my fascination for these gentle giants began but it has never been lost. they are said to have qualities that i admire in humans. this may be what captures me the most. they have families or packs. mother and baby elephants remain close for years. elephants talk to one another. they can communicate over a long distance. they greet each other when close by and they are quite social. i have seen an elephant kick a soccer ball, throw darts, and even paint. truthfully, these acts were a bit troublesome to behold. the one thing that has struck me is that they mourn. they mourn the loss of a friend, a relative, a child. but they also celebrate the birth of a newborn with trumpeting squeals. i just wanted to give a shout out to my favorite animal.
there is a place
there is a place i have seen and felt, if but momentarily. it isn't a place i can find and pinpoint with the accuracy of a GPS. it isn't a place i can actually touch and mark physically. although, there are things that can come as a result of being in this place. for me, a painting, a drawing or a photograph may result. for others perhaps a song of words or notes, a sculpture, the design of an edifice or the details therein, a poignant speech or the written word. this place is somewhere i long to be but time and the chores of life hinder. sometimes it's my own selfishness that limits my ability to remain in this place. i know this is a place i need to find more often.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
peppermint bark, pressures and patience
too bad helvetica isn't a font choice, because i'd be using it. has anyone seen that pbs show about it? i don't imagine anyone has. i'm starting this blog thanks to a dear friend who has inspired me; unbeknownst to her.
noelle, your friendship has been a blessing in my life. although we don't see each other but once a year (if i'm lucky), i do hope our friendship gets to continue through the eternities...somehow.
just polished off some peppermint bark i got december before last. that's december of 2008. thanks hillary. peppermint bark needs to be obtainable more than once a year. there's something about it that subdues my taste for sweets. could it be perhaps that it is made of nothing but sugar, chocolates white and dark, and bits of pepermint candy canes? the crunch of the cane and the melting of chocolate in my mouth are so wonderful to me.
i'm currently listening to john mayer's 'heartbreak warfare'. it has a bad word in it so i won't be posting a link. but i do wish youtube had a repeat button.
i've found my life to be as unplanned as it could've ever been. i'm sure there are a select few on the earth who can say that they've lived a life they have completely planned. nevertheless, the unknown events that are to occur never cease to amaze and those that have passed have taught me a great deal.
i was e-chatting with a 'friend' yesterday. (i use the term 'friend' loosely as i have yet to actually meet him.) blue as blue can be, i let it all out and tears streamed down the sides of my face as i did. i'm sure he didn't know. it was so nice to chat without any kind of pressure. pressure to like, pressure to be liked, pressure to impress or to not. just honest convo. receiving heartfelt encouragement, understanding and advice was the most fulfilling part about the chat. i came away with a link to a talk about patience given by Elder Neal A. Maxwell that i've tried to chew and savor slowly.
noelle, your friendship has been a blessing in my life. although we don't see each other but once a year (if i'm lucky), i do hope our friendship gets to continue through the eternities...somehow.
just polished off some peppermint bark i got december before last. that's december of 2008. thanks hillary. peppermint bark needs to be obtainable more than once a year. there's something about it that subdues my taste for sweets. could it be perhaps that it is made of nothing but sugar, chocolates white and dark, and bits of pepermint candy canes? the crunch of the cane and the melting of chocolate in my mouth are so wonderful to me.
i'm currently listening to john mayer's 'heartbreak warfare'. it has a bad word in it so i won't be posting a link. but i do wish youtube had a repeat button.
i've found my life to be as unplanned as it could've ever been. i'm sure there are a select few on the earth who can say that they've lived a life they have completely planned. nevertheless, the unknown events that are to occur never cease to amaze and those that have passed have taught me a great deal.
i was e-chatting with a 'friend' yesterday. (i use the term 'friend' loosely as i have yet to actually meet him.) blue as blue can be, i let it all out and tears streamed down the sides of my face as i did. i'm sure he didn't know. it was so nice to chat without any kind of pressure. pressure to like, pressure to be liked, pressure to impress or to not. just honest convo. receiving heartfelt encouragement, understanding and advice was the most fulfilling part about the chat. i came away with a link to a talk about patience given by Elder Neal A. Maxwell that i've tried to chew and savor slowly.
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